The Invisible

It's been awhile since I posted, I guess because I really didn't have anything important to say - but alas I now do.

Much of society doesn't talk about what I call "The Invisible" - what is the invisible I hear you ask. Well the invisible is something that we can't see, but it can affect many of us in many different ways. For example - Mental Health, Illnesses and other things to that nature. Why do I want to talk about this now? Well, because I am a sufferer. I have an illness that no one can see, I guess it could fall under the Mental Health banner, but it doesn't really. I suffer from Fibromyalgia. Writing about it is so hard for me, because I do try to forget that I have this horrible problem - unfortunately I have it so I just have to deal with it.

Fibromyalgia is and can be a chronic disease which effects the pain receptors going to the brain, so because of this the body experiences huge amounts of pain all over the body 24/7, 365 days a year. It doesn't stop. Like I mentioned before it can fall under the Mental Health banner as it is a problem with the brain - I guess I always knew deep down I was a nut job haha. So who can get Fibro? Anyone, at any time of their life. There are many many symptoms, way too many to list that you may experience when you have Fibro. I will name just a few: Bodily aches, Headaches, IBS, Fibro "Fog" (forgetting things), insomnia. Fibro can be caused mainly by 2 things - Stress or Injury.

There are many treatments both clinical and natural that can help aide in a remission of that dreaded pain each day, but never forget it can creep up on you at any time. I have finally found a clinical treatment that helps, although this week so far has been hard for me. It's my birthday this week and I have a case of the birthday blues. I don't want to celebrate it's just another day for me, and I physically don't feel like celebrating when I'm in such discomfort. This unfortunately I think is something which is causing my body to stress hence my pain currently. Another trigger for me that causes my pain is work. I have recently started a reduced hours "return to work" program now which is better for my body, but financially it sucks like you wouldn't believe. That in itself is a stress that most people tend to experience in their lifetime - financial struggle.

But anyway I'm getting off topic. Fibro is something that cannot be seen such as a broken arm, or having stitches….it's invisible. I remember returning to work after 5 weeks off sick leave, I could hear people "she walks funny now, is she ok" or "she looks fine, why has she been off on sick leave". It drove me crazy and still does. No one can understand what I go through each day - it's a physical struggle from getting up until going to bed. Even now I am getting treatment that is helping, people think I'm fine, I have a smile on my face so it's all A-Ok! Let me tell you it's not. I have to try and smile through the day to get through the day, otherwise I'm going to be this sad shmuck in the corner bawling my eyes out all day. Sometimes I come home and cry - it feels like a release for me for being so strong each week. People don't understand that just because I smile and look happy doesn't mean that I'm coping - smiling each day and trying to look happy is MY way of coping. Just like Mental Health patients you can't see their illness.

Please remember - just because a person is smiling, doesn't always mean they're ok, they're putting on a brave face to cope through another day.

T xx